I Am What I'm Not. Huhh?

I am a bit strange it seems. I don't feel good about the things I have done, but rather, I feel bad about the things I haven't done. In other words, my accomplishmenst don't make me happy, because I am too busy making myself unhappy thinking about all the things I haven't accomplished. Is this a common thing for human beings, or is it just me?
So, are we the things we do, or are we the things we don't do? Or, are we both? Being an intelligent thinking being is not exactly an easy thing. It's complicated. Well, I don't know how it is for you, but for me, it's definitely complicated.
No matter how many of my tasks and goals I manage to finish or reach, it's the ones I didn't, that stay on my mind. That just doesn't seem right. Although it's not exactly the same, it's a little like being unhappy after spending a month in Cancun, Mexico (a beautiful vacation resort), because you didn't go to Bora Bora (a beautiful island).
Maybe, just maybe, being happy has nothing to do with how we feel about ourselves, but how others make us feel, and maybe more importantly, how we make others feel. Just a thought. I could be wrong. I mean, I am only human.

Full Speed Ahead, & Damn the Torpedos

I don't know who first said, "Full speed ahead, and damn the torpedos", but I always thought it had to be a World War II battle ship Commander. Submarines would hunt enemy ships and sink them with torpedos, which were self-propelled explosive devices, or simply put, mobile bombs that were fired under water in the ocean.
The quotation, however, has become an expression, meaning to charge (or proceed) ahead regardless (without concern for) the consequences. This is something I need to practice more, because I think too much about things I should or need to do, and then become overwhelmed by them.
Take cleaning my apartment, for instance (for example). I kept thinking about all the cleaning I had to do, vaccing, dusting, washing the floors, washing the the windows, the kitchen counters, cleaning the bathroom, etc. I got tired just thinking about it, and so, of course, didn't get anything done.
Until I stopped thinking about all the tasks I had to do, and just concentrated on one. After that one, I could think about the next one. And so on, and so forth (a longer way of saying etc., etc.)
The other thing I have to practice, is pacing myself. Many times my energy is very limited, but I still try to get everything done right away. This leads to exhaustion, a bad night's sleep, and usually very low energy the following day. So, I am trying to do smaller amounts of cleaning at one time, and spread all the cleaning out over a few days.
Of course, the best way to clean, is to pay someone else to do it. And that's the way I will do the cleaning as soon as I win the lottery.

I Sleep in My Dreams

This past week it seems I can not get enough sleep, even though I am sleeping anywhere from 7 1/2 to 9 hours each night. I wonder how someone would go about getting a job sleeping. It's a job I could do extremely well, at the moment.
Or maybe I should try to set a new record for the length of time sleeping. I think I might need more practice for that, however. There was a man named Rip Van Winkle who supposedly slept for a hundred years, but, again supposedly, he had some help. It seems he made a couple of supernatural beings angry, and they put him to sleep for a hundred years. Not knowing any supernatural beings off hand, I don't think I could get that kind of help.
One thing that happens when I do sleep a lot, is that I have a lot of strange dreams. Some of them are so vivid (seem very real), that when I wake up I believe the dream is really happening, and I am still in it. It reminds me of the story of a man who leads two lives. One while he is awake, and a completely different one, in a different world, and in a different city, while he sleeps.
So which life is real, or are they both real?
So, am I a man dreaming while I sleep, or am I dream dreaming I am awake?
Sorry, I couldn't resist that one. The actual quote goes, "Am I a man dreaming I am a butterfly, or am I a butterfly dreaming I am a man?" That was from a famous philosopher who had a dream he was a butterfly.
Enough. Time to go to sleep. Sweet dreams...

Cleaning Up

Cleaning up is never any fun. Unless, of course, you're gambling, in which case, cleaning up could really make your day. But I don't gamble. So, as I said, cleaning up is never any fun for me. I really do not like cleaning, but I am trying to do as my Mother and Sister tell me, which is do a little at a time.
Friday I planned on doing a lot of cleaning, but as I mentioned in an earlier post, I was visited by a couple of maintenance men and a plumber, so never had a chance to get anything done other than keep Edgar calm.
Saturday I got the dusting done, and then was overwhelmed by an attack of needing-to-lay-on-the-couch for the rest of the day. But I did manage to watch a lot of tv.
Sunday was the perfect day to practice procrastination, which means practicing never doing today what you can put off doing until tomorrow.
Monday (yesterday) I did vac (clean the floors with a vacuum cleaner) the apartment, and I also got all my laundry washed and dried. So, I now have clean underwear and socks again.
Today I had to wait for a maintenance man to come and finish some work on a couple of doors, which he has, and now he is gone.
Which leaves me with lots of time to start washing the floors. But first, I think I better relax on the couch with Edgar, and read the newspaper. Who Knows? If I wait long enough, maybe someone will come by and wash the floors for me. Now that I would call really cleaning up...I should be so lucky.

Too Much This, Not Enough That, But We Do Need the Rain...

So, I had great plans for Friday. There were many things I wanted to accomplish. To quote a great writer, "The best laid plans of mice and men often go awry," which means plans often never work out the way we wanted them to. First, Friday morning a maintenance man showed up to finish some work on the bathtub/shower. When he finally finished, I managed to get out to run a couple of errands (going to the grocery store and the pharmacy). When I got back, the kitchen sink was backing up (water was coming up into the sink). While I was on the phone to call maintenance, a workman stuck his face in the kitchen window to see if I was having problems and scared the hell out of Edgar. It turns out he was working on the sink next door, and since both sinks use the same pipe to drain, well, we both were now having problems. So he now had to come in to work on the problem from my side, which took all afternoon.
During that time I had to stay in the living room to keep Edgar calm. It seems he didn't like that particular workman, and remained agitated the entire time he was there. Luckily another workman replaced him after the first couple of hours.
When the last man left at about 6 o'clock, he told me he couldn't fix the problem, which was a drain blockage in the pipe line. But, he had called a plumber, who would be here in about an hour. The plumber did fix the problem, but by the time he left it was after 8 o'clock, and the day was gone.
I suppose it was for the better that I had not had the time to wash the kitchen floor that morning, since it would now have to be washed again.
And that, my friends, was my exciting Friday. Most of the things I planned to do on Friday still need to be done. And since it is such a lovely rainy day, I believe I am going to spend the day not doing them again.
Some days we are prevented from doing things we wanted or planned to do. Other days, we are given excellent excuses not to do those same things, which we now don't really feel like doing. Rainy day, dream away, let the sun take a holiday...Enjoy!

Nothing, Something, Everything...

Well, today I have nothing I feel like writing about. Although, I guess writing about nothing could be considered writing about something. But there's no way that writing about nothing could be confused with writing about everything. Writing about everything would be impossible, I think. Plus, it would take a very long time. Probably more than one lifetime. On the other hand, writing about nothing should be easy, and take no time at all. However, I do know a few people who can talk about nothing for hours. So I suppose it would be possible to write about nothing for a very long time, also. But it would definitely be quite boring to read. It does seem a little confusing, if not complicated, doesn't it? Or maybe it's just me.
Anyway, to summarize: writing about nothing could be considered writing about something but would probably be very boring for the reader. So it's probably better to write about something, but first one has to have something to write about. Writing about everything is just unthinkable, if it's at all possible, unless one is writing about everything that is only of concern to the writer. In which case, it would probably be very boring for everyone else, and so would be the same as writing about nothing.
And that, is all I have to say about that.

No Worries, No Headaches

Do not worry if the post I did earlier today was too much for you. As sometimes happens, I got a bit "carried away", or went somewhat "overboard" (went too far) with my writing about mythology. So, if you can understand some, or most of it, great. But don't give yourself a headache. I will keep it simpler next time, and as I said, hopefully a bit less serious. Hope everyone is, and stays, well...